The Cheese Stealer's Handbook

The Cheese Stealer s Handbook I used to write the truth then smooth it out tone it down and try to make it plausible Then my ex made a convincing case against chronicling my life as a train wreck She claimed my time would be be

  • Title: The Cheese Stealer's Handbook
  • Author: Shoshaku Jushaku
  • ISBN: 9780993624308
  • Page: 106
  • Format: Paperback
  • I used to write the truth, then smooth it out, tone it down, and try to make it plausible Then my ex made a convincing case against chronicling my life as a train wreck She claimed my time would be better spent trying to write about who I want to become Write myself a destiny She said it because she wanted me to become happy Fuck happiness Happiness writes whiI used to write the truth, then smooth it out, tone it down, and try to make it plausible Then my ex made a convincing case against chronicling my life as a train wreck She claimed my time would be better spent trying to write about who I want to become Write myself a destiny She said it because she wanted me to become happy Fuck happiness Happiness writes white It does not show up on the page First I think I have to excise my past No amount of liquor or drugs seems to get rid of the ghosts that haunt me The ghosts have become buddies with the monkey on my back I think the monkey might have substance abuse issues himself Even if I did manage to chase away my demons there might nothing left over If a better me is the goal, maybe I should consider exercise and eating right, or even eating solid food in general before tackling a novel On second thought where to begin

    One thought on “The Cheese Stealer's Handbook”

    1. The need to write a book can destroy you—more than heroin, more than liquor, more than unrequited love. I kicked smack and renounced love. Now all I need to do is give up writing. The very next night I’m sitting here with a bottle at 4am, trying to find my way with a pen—knowing I’m doomed, ruined—never to be saved.Other reviewers have described this book as 'hilarious', and while the humor certainly wasn't lost on me, if I had to describe it in one word, it would be 'heartbreaking' in [...]

    2. A literary conundrum AND a fascinatingly interesting new authorWho is Shoshaku Jushaku and is he putting us on or is he just so finely attuned to the absurdity of life that he offers it back to us with a moniker that is applicable to a myriad of encounters? He seems to be a Canadian creation but more than that we haven't a clue except that he writes so well. . Try looking for a bio and all the web reveals is some fascinating information about the name he has chosen. "Life is one continuous mista [...]

    3. ***I was offered a free ebook copy of this book by the author in exchange for my honest review***I have no idea what I just read. Was it autobiographical? I can't tell if this book is one long drug induced ramble or if the author is just brilliant. Did these things really happen? Right from the start I wanted to wring the main character's neck. He is such an irresponsible jerk! The entire time I was reading this book I was thinking to myself, how can anyone tolerate this person. Why can't he jus [...]

    4. A raucous ride of debauchery, self-indulgence and character self-examination. Shoshaku Joshaku’s The Cheese Stealer’s Handbook is a hilarious glimpse into the life and mind of an unrepentant, self-centered amoralist and a journal of his experiences. The protagonist manipulates life observation with the most twisted metaphors and a hilarious first-person, self-deprecating outlook on life and the world. A rarity, although the protagonist may seem irredeemable, the glimpse into his mind keeps y [...]

    5. Note: I received a free e-copy of this book in exchange for a fair and honest review. And here it is.The Cheese Stealer's Handbook is by and far one of the more unique things I have ever read. Darkly acidic humor that in the end burns through your heart, you may not give this novella repeat readings but I think everyone should give it a look at least once.How to describe this work? The Cheese Stealer's Handbook reads less like a journal than it does a drugged-up Catcher in the Rye with elements [...]

    6. Synopsis:I used to write the truth, then smooth it out, tone it down, and try to make it plausible. Then my ex made a convincing case against chronicling my life as a train wreck. She claimed my time would be better spent trying to write about who I want to become. "Write myself a destiny." She said it because she wanted me to become happy . . . Fuck happiness. Happiness writes white. It does not show up on the page. First I think I have to excise my past. No amount of liquor or drugs seems to g [...]

    7. Well, thank you Shoshaku Jushaku for taking me on a great rideor was it a long ride wait, did this ever really happen? Lets just say it did and it was a great and very long ride.I started this 112 pg book and after about 20 pages had to put it down again. It felt like I'd stepped through a time warp to when my older brother and I lived together. When I picked it back up, I went back to the beginning and started it over again from a different perspective and read through it in one sitting.The Che [...]

    8. I was mailed this book for review, so I'm gonna write this, but I really wish I wasn't spending any more time on it than I already have. This book is just a poorly written version of a Charles Bukowski/John Fante/JD Salinger/Beat Generation cliche. Typing on his typewriter in his rented room on the desk he paid a "junkie" to haul upstairs for him, getting too fucked up and breaking the heart of some "crazy" cliche woman. Just another tortured writer type who thinks addiction equals depth, but th [...]

    9. Disclaimer: I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.I used to write the truth, then smooth it out, tone it down, and try to make it plausible. Then my ex made a convincing case against chronicling my life as a train wreck. She claimed my time would be better spent trying to write about who I want to become. "Write myself a destiny." She said it because she wanted me to become happy . . . Fuck happiness. Happiness writes white. It does not show up o [...]

    10. I received this book in exchange for an honest review.Reading this book is a bit like watching a car crash. You want to look away, put it down, but for some reason it keeps you hooked reading just the next page/Chapter. The book follows the mad reasoning’s and rambling of a drunk and drugged new author in his quest to write a new book. His love life, his cravings for the next “hit” and his inability to understand what he had written the night before. This isn’t Trainspotting and don’t [...]

    11. Ever wondered what goes through a crackhead's mind? Shoshaku Jushaku will give you real insight into the mind of someone completely aware that what he does is destructive, self-defeating, and basically wrong, but is somehow unable to change. The human condition, battered by storms of existential angst? Or just a self-obsessed depressive? You decide!There are a few excellent sentences in this short book, and a few laugh out loud moments. This is clearly a smart guy, but one utterly ruled by drugs [...]

    12. I have ambivalent thoughts towards this book. My first thought when I read this was "I hope this is not autobiographical" just for the sake of the helpless character. He struggles with drugs, he might think it´s cool to be a narcissistic bigot, mainly because Bukowski have been there, Céline have been there, Miller have been there and the list goes on (since he is an aspiring author). I hate the nihilist way he treats people, especially his girlfriends. I think people that are not even ready t [...]

    13. DISCLOSURE: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in return for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions which follow are entirely my own.While I liked the IDEA of this book, based on the synopsis, I have to say that the REALITY of it was very disappointing. I'm thinking it would have been better kept as the author's personal journal rather than subjecting the rest of the world to this drivel. The language was raw and vulgar, but I tried not to let that influence my opinion on the [...]

    14. I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.I have no idea what I just read I'm not sure if it was an autobiography or not. All I got from it was that it was about an author who has substance abuse issues. I liked that it was set in Toronto though and talked about UofT because I'm going there next year! I found that the story line jumped around a lot and I often found myself confused and lost trying to put the story together. Some lines in the book were quite funny and [...]

    15. I really liked the way this book it was written. The words are easy to read, the narrator talks in a natural and common way. I liked that.I sometimes found it desperating how the narrator cannot give up his addiction. But then again, an addiction is not something to take lightly: it is a sickness. He made me feel kind of sorry for him even though he was an asshole all the time. He was a poor asshole, who had taken bad decisions in life and did not know how to go back. I'd wish someone had helped [...]

    16. Hmm what to say, it was a quick confusing read. Having never personally done drugs my experience is watching the destruction from a safe a vantage point of friend of a friend. The biggest question is why? That was never answered. The tortured artist? Maybe. The biggest surprise was the ending, since I wasn't paying attention to the tracking I was surprised when there wasn't another page so I reread the last couple to see what I had missed. I was disappointed to see I hadn't missed anything

    17. I'm really not sure what to think of this book it was very confusing. Since it's told from the point of view of a drug addict, it being confusing makes sense. I really liked the concept of this book, and I did like the story. It was neat to see into the head of an addict, even if it makes the story a bit incoherent. I'm about 80% sure I like this book. It has humor and heartbreak and love and hate. Everything anyone could want.

    18. I received a free copy of this book in return for an honest review.This is a Confusing, incoherent and pacey journal. Shoshaku Joshaku’s The Cheese Stealer’s Handbook is a snapshot at what toxic environment can do to a high IQ.I get the feeling that Shoshaku Joshaku would not care about my review so let me just say I liked it and you should read it on a coach journey and stare at the guy making a lot of noise in the back seat and think about what’s going through his mind.

    19. THIS WAS HILARIOUS (yet slightly sad). Was it true? was this actually a memoir? or was it a brilliant set of rambling that produced a wonderful train of thought novel? I do not know. But I enjoyed it. (P.S. don't do drugs kids.)(P.P.S I received a free copy of this in exchange for an honest review; and I look forward to reading more from this author.)

    20. Very interesting and intense book from the author's perspective of living with his addictions and trying to form relationships.I could only think one thing at the end please don't let my kids end up with this lifestyle!

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